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Paczki Tuesday

4 Mar

The doors open at Pticek’s & Son and the people rush in.

Very few things can draw a line of folks out the door and halfway down the block in single-digit temperatures like a Polish bakery in Chicago on Paczki Tuesday. The centuries old tradition of gorging oneself the day before swearing off sweets for forty days resonates especially well with the Polish community, and my family specifically. It’s been one of our favorite holidays for as long as I can remember.

“You get five out of your six (adult) kids to come home for Paczki Tuesday?” a friend of my father’s exclaimed over the phone last night. “You guys must really love paczkis!!!”

We do. But not only for their other-worldly deliciousness.

Pticek's was packed with patrons waiting patiently for their paczki's.

Pticek’s was packed with patrons waiting patiently for their paczki’s.

For those of you who don’t know, a paczki (poonch-key) is a Polish pastry. It’s two pieces of deep fried dough, covered in powdered sugar, and sandwiched together around a whipped cream, custard, or most commonly a fruit filling.

It’s no wonder there were thirty people waiting outside the door of Pticek’s on 56th and Narragansett at 4:45 am this morning. The place didn’t open up for another fifteen minutes, and people were already antsy to get in, get their deep-fried doughy goods and get back home. I know I was.

The 5:00 am paczki-run has been a tradition I’ve enjoyed being a part of since I was a kid. Every Fat Tuesday I’d be up well before dawn with my mother, and we’d embark on our route. We used to have as many as five stops to make on our route, including auntie’s, nana’s and great aunt’s, who were all depending on us to deliver their boxes of treats. It was an honor as a kid, riding shotgun on the Paczki Express. And once we made it back home, it was our time to have our holiday feast.

In my family, however, paczki’s take on an even greater significance. Little did I know that the palatable Polish pastry was the very reason my parents met.

Paczki's by the dozen.

Paczki’s by the dozen.

The year was 1982, the president was Ronald Reagan. A young Jimmy Berent had just arrived at the bar with a few teammates after a CAC (Catholic Alumni Club) volleyball game. The plan was to get their final indulgences in on Tuesday night before the beginning of Lent on Ash Wednesday the next day. So they bellied up to the bar for a few pitchers, and to polish off the remaining paczki’s Jimmy had brought with him.

All of the sudden, a pretty-eyed dark-haired woman walks over to his position. She asks, “Excuse me, are those paczki’s?”

“Yes,” Jimmy responds.

“Can I have one?” the woman asks.

“Well, you kind of have to be Polish,” says Jimmy.

“Well my last name is Budzinski…” says the woman.

After nearly falling out of his barstool, my father sliced up a paczki and shared it with the woman who would go on to be my mother. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Paczki Tuesday is a celebration I invite all of you to join, and you don’t even have to be Polish. Paczki’s are better when shared. So go out and grab a dozen. Actually, make that two. Who knows? You might even find that special someone on the other end of that fried dough.

You’re Going to Run to the Lake?

17 Feb

With a solid 5 inches still on the ground, Chicagoland was delivered another dusting of snow this afternoon. It was light stuff, but came down in a flurried hurry, reducing visibility to no more than 3 blocks for most of the afternoon. So I thought, what a perfect day to go for a run by Lake Michigan?

You might think I’m crazy. In fact, most folks thought I was. I stopped by the Ray Meyer Fitness and Recreation Center to set up a base camp, and then begin my journey about 1.5 miles to the Lake. A few friends there asked where the heck I was going, so I told them, and received nothing but astonished reactions. Who  goes out for a jovial jog in blinding snow, 20º temperatures, and 15° wind chill? What loon thinks it a thrill to brave conditions that would force most of us to barricade ourselves indoors with blankets, warm beverages and TV marathons, just to see more piles of snow and a frozen over lake?

I do.Snow Covered

So in the locker rooms I began to prepare myself for the trek. My feet would be protected by socks, plastic bags, another pair of socks, and shoes. Compression shorts, gym shorts, and track pants on my lower half, with a dry-fit, t-shirt, heavy longsleeve, and raincoat over my torso. Headgear was crucial if I was going to survive. A bandanna, a toboggan, a beanie, a face warmer and two scarves bundled my face tighter than Ralphie’s little brother in A Christmas Story. I cued up some classics on my iPod classic, and was ready to run.

The only footprints I saw were my own.

The only footprints I saw were my own.

The cold was not an issue. I had layered successfully. The real struggle was the terrian. Short, choppy steps were necessary to keep my foot moving at a brisk pace. It was a relief when strolling along a freshly shoveled sidewalk, but those were few and far between. The snow was coming down too quickly. I found footing in the tracks of others through the rough stretches of unattended sidewalks, but even then my ankles plunged into tracks that were lumpy and slippery.

As I approached the Lake from the entrance at Fullerton avenue, there were no signs anyone had been down this path in a while. The only footprints I saw were my own. A trailblazing sense of triumph went through my veins. Was I the only nut out here? Am I the singular reason they put up signs during weather like this saying, “Lakefront Trail CLOSED?”Lake Shore Path Closed

I’ve been running to the Lake many a times, and never saw it like this. Never saw it so desolate and undisturbed but at the same time so lively and picturesque. Lake Michigan was frozen, the snow piling up on top of the sheet of ice. Snowdrifts building on the banks where ice met sand. The furiously falling snowflakes veiled the colossal buildings of Chicago’s downtown. From Fullerton and the Lake, what’s usually a vibrant view was now vividly void of color. The sight was panoramic white.  And nobody was around to take in this breathtaking sight but me.

I got as far as that trail closed sign, then turned back and made my trip back. I was feeling high, and more importantly dry. The old Polish trick of lining your gym shoes with plastic bags had worked perfectly, and my layering was holding up to the stiff winter breeze. I trudged my way back through Lincoln Park, stopping only once at a statue of William Shakespeare, just to see how he’s dealing with this weather, and finally made it back. I survived. No hypothermia, not frozen toes, not even a cherry nose.

Was it stupid? Maybe. Dangerous? I didn’t think so. What I saw it as, was an hourlong adventure to Lake Michigan in a daunting snowstorm to take in an awe-inspiring glimpse of chaos, remoteness and serenity.

Lake Michigan

Umm…Why Do You Have a Thesaurus?

27 Jan

Webster's Thesaurus

The other day I picked up my thesaurus, and started reading out of curiosity. I’ve tried reading sections of the dictionary, but the thesaurus was uncharted territory. I figured it’d be a basic line up of synonyms, but I was wrong. I opened the thesaurus to a random page, somewhere in the M’s. Move, moving, mow, moxie, mozo, Mr., Mrs., Mrs. Grundy … Wait what? Mrs. Grundy? What in the world does that mean?

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The Baseball Hall of Fame, Nellie Fox, and my Old Man

14 Jan
Me and my Old Man, in front of Nellie Fox's plaque at the Baseball Hall of Fame (July 1997)

Me and my Old Man, in front of Nellie Fox’s plaque at the Baseball Hall of Fame (July 1997)

The Baseball Hall of Fame has always been the biggest amongst corridors of notoriety. Pro Football Hall of Fame? Hockey Hall of Fame?  It’s where those who excelled in and around America’s pastime are honored eternally. It beats out Hollywood’s Walk of Fame because, well, I’d like not to hurt anyone’s feelings, but you’d be surprised at the list of people and Tokyo-terrorizing monsters who have a star on the boulevard. It defeats all other sports hall’s of fame. Not only because it was established first, but it hasn’t changed its enshrinement style since it’s doors first opened in 1936.

I’m talking more about the plaques, and what it means to be on one of those plaques.  Your now immortal baseball likeness in bronze; and right below it your career record, and a 12-lines or less bio that captures your stats, status and spirit. It’s a 100 word summary of why you deserve a permanent place in the history of the game.

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What’s in a Bullpen Name?

8 Apr

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What’s in a name? If you’re a relief pitcher, it’s everything.

Because relief pitchers face far less hitters and appear more sporadically than starting pitchers, they’re just a name on the roster until they take their late game trot to the mound, emerging from a place who’s name itself is intimidating, the bullpen. It makes us conjure up images of the words historical meaning. Certain prison camps in the American Civil War and WWII were referred to as the bullpen. Or, we think of it’s literal meaning. A place where giant, ornary beasts are waiting to be brought to the chopping block, but suddenly one of them breaks through the fence wild and freed. The straight line sprint of John Rocker or the caffeine infused feet of Todd Coffey.

While charging like a bull from the pen can do a lot to intimidate a hitter, hearing a sterling name blaring through the PA can buckle a hitter’s knees in the on-deck circle.

Yes, beer guts, mustaches and not speaking any English contribute to a reliever’s reputation, but a name can eloquently paint the picture of a man you do NOT want to see on the mound.

It can be something as simple as alliteration, like the Tiger’s Al Alburquerque or former Minnesota big man Boof Bonser. Their names stick in your brain like nursery rhymes.

Animalistic nicknames stick to relievers, no matter what particular species. Does anyone really know Goose Gossage‘s real name. It’s Richard, but after playing for nine different teams in his hall of fame career, it made it easier on everyone to just call him Goose.

Some guys are blessed by birth with naturally tough sounding names. Tug McGraw and Paul Assenmacher. Yes, there’s jokes to be made with both of those names, but each of them spent over 13 years in Major League bullpens.


All you need sometimes is just two syllables. First, last. Rod Beck. Lee Smith. Short, sweet.

Other relievers are benefit from exotic mystique. When a name sounds so foreign your tongue tingles pronouncing it correctly, you know you don’t want to see them warming up for the ninth. PA announcers across the league relished introducing Shingo Takatsu or Mariano Rivera.

And then, there’s guys you can tell that they’re not only Major Leaguers, but crafty late inning hurlers. Rollie Fingers. Bobby Thigpen. Enough said.

Bullpen heroes are something to be treasured by baseball fans everywhere. The pitcher may get yanked, but the names will live on beyond the fences.

Let’s Put On Manti’s Helmet

17 Jan


Helmet

During a morning where Chip Kelly’s flight from Oregon to Philadelphia departure grabbed everyone’s attention, Deadspin ran a Statue of Manti that took everyone’s breath away. Manti Te’o’s “girlfriend” who allegedly passed away within 24 hours of his grandmother was a hoax. Wait what?

And Twitter went wild.

As the details become more clear, we try to piece together what exactly happened through what we know, and who we believe. Deadspin suggests that Te’o may have been very involved in the hoax. As CSNChicago reports, Notre Dame Athletic Director Jack Swarbrick voluntarily addressed the rumors in a press conference, in which he defended the linebacker. Te’o, who graduated from Notre Dame in the December, is all but gone from the forward-thinking Swarbrick’s radar, and he chose to put his reputation on the line by speaking out for Te’o.. The Chicago Sun-Times reports that teammates are supporting Te’o, including roommate Zeke Motta. Te’o’s family reportedly learned of the hoax on December 26th.

Let’s look at this through the eyes of Manti.

People meet on the internet every day in this world, whether it be through dating websites, Facebook, or a common interest in a website. With Manti’s portrayed upstanding character and devout faith, he would seem to be an easy target for someone to pull a prank (or a PR stunt).

There was a Lennay Kekua, in the form of a character. She was real in every way: her picture, her voice, her emotional involvement with Te’o . . except she was fake. Ronaiah Tuiasosopo has admitted to creating the fictional Kekua. Manti may have “met” her in 2009. But it wasn’t at Stanford. It was online. MySpace, e-mail, who knows, but Manti had someone on the other end of the line who pretended to be this amazing woman. We don’t know much about Lennay, but since she was not real, she could paint any picture of herself to Manti that she wanted, and she enamored him. He wanted to meet her.

Manti certainly never met her. But, guys, let’s think of things this way: When you’re dad asks you the typical question regarding your status with the opposite sex, who in their right mind would tell their father that he met this amazing girl online that he’s never met?

So lies were created. But who created them?

His family supported him. Everything seemed to be going well for Manti; he was an outstanding student and starting linebacker at the University of Notre Dame. The media had already christened another golden boy. He even passed up NFL money to stay his senior year at Notre Dame. There was no reason to doubt him. So when his family commented on the girl, they may have been suspicious, but they stuck by Te’o. What reason did they have to not believe him? He’d look crazy if he had started a relationship with a girl in 2009, and in three years had never seen her. So he lied. Out of embarrassment? Out of firm belief? Out of blind hope? Somewhere along the way, he got way too entrenched in his own lie.

There was likely some real person pretending to be Lennay Kekua. The detailed descriptions of phone conversations and teammate’s support suggest it that that part of the story may be true. But Manti’s stardom drew more attention to him. People wanted to know more about him. His narrative was constructed. Can we fault the media for that? Yes and no. They were just doing their jobs, giving us what appeared to be a great narrative of overcoming grief and leading the team to the title game. They did, however, eat it all up. They caught wind of this sensational story and further sensationalized. Very few photos of Kekua exist, that should have been a red flag (then again, it didn’t stop Manti).

Once he discovered the truth in late December, Te’o was devastated. Imagine the shock, grief and disbelief Te’o felt upon discovering the news.

How does a Heisman runner-up tell his millions of fans, weeks before the BCS National Title Game against Alabama, that he was the victim of an elaborate hoax?

You don’t.

That’s none of your fan’s business. It’s a deeply, deeply personal tragedy that you’d like to keep to yourself and your closest friends and family. A situation as unbelievably embarrassing as this is something most of us would hope to bury 100 feet underground.

All that has been reported about when Te’o actually learned Kekua was a hoax, is that he “received a call from “Kekua’s Sister” on December 6th, saying Lennay was not dead and she wanted to rekindle the relationship. ”

Imagine that world of confusion Te’o was now just thrown into. The Heisman ceremony is in 2 days, and his mind was just completely criss-crossed by that phone call. He wasn’t even sure himself. And why would he let anything leak days before the Heisman ceremony? It would have completely confused everyone and ruined his chances?

During the Heisman ceremony, when Fowler brought up his girlfriend, what is he supposed to say? On live national television,

“Actually Chris, I received a call from my girlfriend’s sister saying she is alive now. I’m kind of confused about this whole situation. I don’t know what’s going on, I’m just happy to be here in New York and a candidate for this prestigious award.”

Te’o didn’t have an option. He needed time to grasp all of this, just like the rest of us. So when he finally came to terms with what happened, he developed a plan to tell the public in a manner that would be easiest to digest. Except Deadspin beat him to the punch.

So who’s at fault here?

The Media

For creating the gripping Te’o narrative.

For failing to diligently fact-check.

And though kudos goes to Deadspin for uncovering this hoax, things would have been a lot clearer if Te’o had been able to handle this situation instead of the media leaking the tale, and causing a nation-sweeping stir. Then again, would we have ever found out if Deadspin didn’t come out with it’s findings?

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The Catholic 7’s Next Move?

13 Jan

When DePaul, Georgetown, Marquette, Providence, Seton Hall, St. Johns and Villanova decided to leave the Big East a month ago, it was (and still is) uncertain what the schools will do regarding their conference fate.

Since the announcement, ESPN’s Darren Rovell has reported that the “Catholic 7” will look to add three-to-five schools in order to form a 10- to 12-team conference. This will make them a balanced conference, and attract a power conference-type TV deal. The question, however, is who should get the invite?

The seven former Big East schools share a lot in common. (Click to enlarge)

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They’re all mid-sized Catholic Universities located in or near major urban areas with storied basketball traditions and no Division I FBS football program. There are several schools in the A-10 and Horizon League that fit that description.

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Dayton and Xavier would be natural fits to join the Catholic 7. The two schools have a combined nine Tournament appearances in the past ten years, with Xavier reaching the Elite Eight in ’04 and ’08.

Butler might be the toughest catch, but it would be worthwhile. They would be the only non-Catholic school (they’re affiliated with the Christian Church). That aside, Brad Stevens is looking like the next great college coach, and they would add two more Final Four appearances to the Catholic 7’s existing 18.

Loyola is a program that seems to be on the rise, along with their North Side of Chicago neighbor DePaul. Renew that rivalry in an already basketball crazy town.

Valparaiso and Detroit also have a history with many of their Midwestern Catholic brethren. At roughly 3,000 full-time undergraduates, both schools have lower attendances than any of the school’s mentioned. Both schools are at the top of the Horizon League. Detroit has a bona fide star this season in Ray McCallum Jr. and who can forget current Valpo head coach Bryce Drew‘s 1998 buzzer beater (and subsequent swan dive.) His father Homer was his coach that season, just as Ray Jr. currently plays for Ray Sr. at Detroit.

Another school that would fit the bill could be MVC giant Creighton. The Blue Jays have a formidable father-son duo themselves in head coach Greg and high-scoring guard Doug. They’ve gone dancing eight out of the past fourteen seasons.

With the conference realignment epidemic crossing over to the basketball side of things, Depaul, Georgetown,, Marquette, Providence Seton, Hall, St. John’s and Villanova have a chance to form a basketball that is as strong top-to-bottom as any conference in the NCAA.

In the coming months, we will see.

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Johnson & Johnson Tape and Beer, and Not Neccessarily in That Order

18 Dec

Football When Men Were Men

  “One of the results of this high finance in football today is that the guys don’t hang around together the way they used to when I played. I mean, you just don’t see quarterbacks drilling forward passes into the lineman’s schnozzes to slow down their rushes and then buying you a beer afterward, the way Norm Van Brocklin used to drill me and buy for me.

-Art Donovan, from his 1988 book, Fatso

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 Could you imagine elite quarterback’s like Matt Ryan or Tom Brady drilling defensive linemen in the face then buying them a few rounds after the game?  Or guys like Jim Harbaugh “borrowing” a taxicab to drive an over-served teammate back to the team hotel?

“We were playing an exhibition game in Milwaukee once, and a bunch of us, naturally, we’re drinking in a local bar. Around midnight, most of us left, but Shula stayed there with Carl Taseff, another defensive back. We were back up at the hotel for a little while when suddenly the cops showed up. Uh-oh. One officer walked up to me and said, “We know one of you Colts stole a taxicab. Who was it?” What happened was Shula and Taseff honked the horn of a cab outside the bar, but the driver didn’t show up. So Shula put Taseff, who was stewed to the gills, in the back of the cab, put the cabbie’s hat on, and drove back to the hotel. And you know, they never would have gotten caught, except Taseff was slow getting out of the cab. He wanted to pay Shula the fare.” – Fatso

  According to Art Donovan, the league was built upon two things in those days. Johnson & Johnson tape, and beer. A time where toughness and discipline were tops on the list of what made a great player, and year-round training was unheard of. These guys were playing the game because they loved it. The salaries were modest. Donovan signed his first professional football contract for an unguaranteed $4,500, which would be $76,800 in today’s worth.

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-Darrel Norenberg/NFL

  Not only were they working class, but the majority of them went overseas in WWII defending our country. Hall of Famers like George Halas, Chuck Bednarik, Marion Motley and Otto Graham all fought. It was a different kind of man who played pro-football in that day. As David Rowe writes,

“The commercialization of sport and the commodification of  athletes (transformed from casual ‘players’ into sportsworkers selling their athletic labor power as ‘products’ bought and sold on the sport market) opened up a deep schism within the institutional ideology of sport itself.”

Sport Culture and the Media (2004)

  Well, I’m not here to provide any social commentary, I’m just here to share some good stories from Art Donovan, the League’s greatest story teller. His nights on David Letterman were a riot every time. But the all-time greatest Art Donovan story comes from 1945, when he was stationed in Guam, awaiting the call to invade Japan.

“One night we were working all night on the docks near Agana, Guam’s capital, emptying cargo ships and getting all this stuff ready for the invasion of Japan. We were sure it was going to be ordered any minute. At about four in the morning, I and a couple of other guys found a case of Spam down in the hold of a troop transport. So I grabbed it, loaded it onto our truck, and finally stashed it under our tent.

Well, the next day there was a typhoon, a real gullywasher, and wouldn’t you know it but that’s the day this young lieutenant just in from the States, a real greenhorn, picked to pull tent inspection. Jesus Christ, can you imagine tent inspection in a war zone? Anyway, he looked under the floor of our tent, and the rain had washed away the dirt we had dumped on the case of Spam. He said to us, “What’s that?” Nobody said nothing, so he ordered us to pull it out. Finally he asked, “This is government property. Where did you guys steal it from?” Still nobody said nothing. He asked again, “Who does it belong to?” After a long pause, I told him it was mine. He asked me where I got it, and I lied to him. I told him I found it on the side of the road.

The greenhorn left, and the next thing I knew a runner came up and told me to get dressed in khakis and go see the regimental adjuttnt. The adjutant’s name was Joe McFadden, and he was from New Jersey. He was also the former quarterback of Georgetown’s football team. I stood there shuffling my feet and finally Major McFadden asked, “Donovan, where’d you steal the Spam?” I told him I found it laying by the side of the road and he said, “Goddamnit, Donovan, don’t lie to me.” So I admitted that I took it from the hold of a troop ship we were cleaning out. And he said to me, “What were you going to do with it? Sell it to the gooks?” And I said, “No sir, I’m going to eat it.” He said, “I told you not to lie to me. Nobody eats that crap.” I told him, “I do. I like it.”

Then he asked me where I was from. I told him New York, and he asked me if I was in any relation to the fight referee. I told him that ref was my father. Now I figured a McFadden from New Jersey who played football at Georgetown is not going to throw a Donovan from New York who played football at Notre Dame into the brig over a case of Spam. Sure enough, Major McFadden told me he was going to give me a week to eat the whole case, or, as he put it, “your ass belongs to me.”

I ate the whole case in six days.
Thirty pound of Spam. I was the company hero. The cooks used to come over to our tent and put the Spam in batter and cook it up for me. Twenty-four hours a day I’d be eating Spam. And loving it. They let me off the hook and, I still have a soft spot in my heart for Spam.” 

Fatso